Why would you ever work for this company?

At the risk of sounding like an entrepreneurial zealot in the wake of yesterday's post, this article from the Daily Mail infuriated/baffled me, and I just had to rant about it (emphasis mine).

Staff at one of the world’s top investment banks have been issued with a 43-page dress code specifying in minute detail what they can and can’t wear – and it’s bad news for fans of tight skirts or lacy black bras.

The guidance from Swiss firm UBS warns women to wear flesh-­coloured underwear, and avoid flashy jewellery and coloured artificial nails. Men are told choose ties with patterns that ‘match the bone structure of the face’.

Under the rules for women, it states: 'You should not wear flashy jewellery or skirts that are too tight behind.

It adds: 'Women should not wear shoes that are too tight-fitting as there is nothing worse than a strained smile... (WTF?!?!??!)

For men it states: 'You should wear a straight-cut two button jacket and trousers that make up part of a classic professional suit.

'Wear only ties that match the bone structure of the face and do not wear socks with cartoon motifs. (NOOOOO DON'T TAKE AWAY MY SCOOBY DOO SOCKS!!)

'Three days of stubble is not permitted and a visit to the barber is recommended once every four weeks.'...

The move is part of a bid to improve the image of UBS, which suffered after it accepted a £37billion bailout – Europe’s biggest – in the 2008 financial crisis...

A UBS spokesman said clients and staff had reacted well to the rules, which are being applied at five offices in Switzerland.

It said in a statement: 'The reputation of UBS makes up our most precious asset.

'So adopting irreproachable behaviour implies having an impeccable presentation.'

As I was reading the article, some of the lines were so ridiculous that I had to assume it was a joke. It is a joke, right? It has to be, right??? It's not.

First of all, why would you ever work for a company that feels the need to issue a 43 PAGE DRESS CODE?? I don't care what you think the value of "image" is, image doesn't make a strong company. Strong products and services do. Dressing incompetent people in nicer clothes DOESN'T ACTUALLY MAKE THEM MORE COMPETENT. If you want to project an image of professionalism and attention to detail, hire professional people who have solid attention to detail--don't hire ignorant slobs and try to dress them in different clothing.

I understand the value of "looking nice", and I appreciate that many places have dress codes (and I abide by them when it is asked of me). Similarly, I think it's too bad that so many people these days seem to think that a t-shirt and jeans is acceptable attire for all situations. While I don't think we should all be wearing sweatshirts to the office, there's a certain point at which things get ridiculous. "Ties that match the bone structure of the face"? What does that even mean?

If UBS and other similar companies started worrying a little less about image and P.R. and a little more about actually running a solid business, maybe we might have a more robust global economy. Why are people so readily willing to sacrifice personal freedoms for a paycheck? I really don't understand it. Please, somebody tell me that this dress code is a joke and that I've been had. Please.


[Daily Mail]