Tuesday, October 9, 2012

Hungry Hungry Hippos

Now... I am absolutely certain that I joked about this, sarcastically and dismissively, when the movie version of Battleship was announced and released. But now, it's a reality, and I just... I don't even know anymore.
It is a poser that even the most creative of screenwriters might struggle with: how to adapt the children's game Hungry Hungry Hippos into a blockbuster movie. Nevertheless, that is the task facing Hollywood's brightest minds this morning after manufacturer Hasbro confirmed last week that it is planning a big-screen outing for the brightly coloured plastic playthings (Ed. Note: this is what we're talking about. Yeah...)
Hungry Hungry Hippos is part of a roster of planned films that also includes Monopoly (a project that at one point had Ridley Scott attached) and Britain's Action Man, the latter despite his American cousin GI Joe having already featured twice in multiplexes. Hasbro has been inspired by the multibillion-dollar success of its Transformers franchise in the hands of Michael Bay, and apparently has not let Battleship's disappointing $300m (on a $200m budget) haul earlier this year upset its plans for worldwide domination. 
The latest proposal to bring its range to cinemas has been hatched in partnership with Hollywood film production company Emmett/Furla, which says it will make three movies in the next two years.
I'm being punked, here, right? This is all an elaborate joke? Whatever. Clue was pretty good, I guess... when does Yahtzee come out?


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